Why I love talking to myself

My mom told me this once before.

“When you were younger, you talk to yourself.”

And I still do! Even at 22! (That rhymes, by the way. Lol!)

I know, pretty weird. But I could never not remember a day in my life where I stopped talking to myself. The thing is, I love talking to myself. Does that make me sound crazy? I hope not. I would hate having you to think that you’re reading some crazy person’s blog.

I have fun talking to myself. I am my own company, especially when I have no one to talk to. I guess, that’s why I like writing on journals and blogs, it’s like me talking to myself but without my mouth moving, just the voices in my head; my thoughts, if you may. And the best part is (or not, lol), people get to read it.

I talk to myself at night especially, before going to bed. I remember dragging my sister into being one of my ‘guest’ for my talk show whereby I would be the ‘host’ and ‘audience 1′ and my sister would be ‘audience 2′. She would play along for a while, but then, she would get bored and go sleep, so I would continue playing around.

Mom would sometimes knock on the wall to tell me to sleep after listening me talking to myself. “Are you talking to yourself? Go to sleep!” But I wouldn’t go to sleep, in fact, I would continue talking, or rather, whispering to myself.

Source: Scientist Find Talking To Yourself Is Good

I’d speak in different accents too. I love playing around with accents; especially American accents since I’m so good at it because of TV and stuff. I suppose, that’s where I improved my English. It seems a bit ridiculous, I know, but it’s the truth!

It’s hard to tell people though. Sometimes they would ask,

“Your English is so formal when you speak, and you have an accent. Were you in private school before? Or perhaps, lived somewhere else outside of Malaysia?”

Since it would be weird to say “Oh, I learn my accent from talking to myself. You know, normal stuff!”, I would reply, “Television and movies,”

I especially like interviewing myself. I would put on different characters or just be myself and lay out some questions for me to answer. They are really random questions; questions that came from the top of my mind. My answers are really random too. Sometimes, they don’t make sense! And I like that it’s alright for me to not make sense because I get a laugh out of it.

This spontaneousness allowed me to apply it in real life especially when it comes to performing on stage (I’m a theatre performer for a local theatre house), public speaking or emceeing for events.

I used to love acting like a radio jockey. It’s fun. I would bring out my radio with an empty cassette in it to the living room and put on MTV and just record myself talking, then directing the radio to the TV for music.

“Hi guys, this is Jasmine. Do you love Madonna? I sure love her! She’s the best! Here’s a song from her.” *takes radio and put near TV speakers*

Of course, nobody listens to those recording other than myself.

Source: 47 Project

As I got older though, I found out about podcasts and did some of those, but it never lasted. Nonetheless, I had such great fun doing it though.

Me talking to myself over the years improved several things:

• My speech
• Clarity of voice
• Pronunciation
• Acting (from all the role-playing I did)
• Accent
• Confidence in public speaking and speaking in general
• Getting to know people (Q&A sessions – role-playing – helped!)

I know it’s a little insane to owe it all to talking to yourself, but it’s true! I actually did improve on these things with just talking to myself. I love it.

I still talk to myself even until today. In fact, I was talking to myself just now, before writing this post.

I read somewhere that talking to yourself is a good thing. That’s so true. I never thought of my love for talking to myself is actually me being in touch with my inner being. When I read that article, I was blown away! I owe talking to myself (whether verbally or through my thoughts) a lot because it has helped me get through some pretty tough times.

When I’m down, all I had was myself to be comforted by because nobody understood my like I do. I have friends, don’t get me wrong. I have tons of them and I love each and every one of them. But sometimes, it’s good to just get some alone time, you know. :)

So yes, that is my story.

Do you talk to yourself too? I’m sure I’m not alone!

The blog challenge: Day 8

Day 8: A place you’ve travelled to

This picture was taken two years ago in front of the Notre Dame Cathedral in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam. I enjoyed Vietnam a lot. Probably because it was so different from Malaysia, despite it being a part of the Asian continent.

I always thought that countries in Asia are all the same, so I didn’t think that it was worth our time to explore them. I guess that’s why Asians prefer to travel in Western countries and those from the West in turn, come here. But after Vietnam and Korea though, I pretty much realized that they are so different from Malaysia and I am thankful that I had the opportunity to travel there.

Vietnam is so rich with culture and history. I didn’t know much about Vietnam before going there and even when I was there, I did the whole touristy thing despite having family who know the place well, like any local would.

I would love to go back there again and explore the place fully, especially since I did a lot of research on Vietnam and its history for my assignment and bring a very good camera with me to capture images there.

I’m currently doing a 30-day blog challenge in my ‘somewhat’ personal blog. Go there and read about more challenges :)

My thoughts on the kidnapping of Nayati.

A few days ago, my friends and I were talking about everything from life, love and the bunch of security guards who carry their flashlights and flash them at couples and suspicious people who were sitting around the park where we were at.

Then, our topic went to the unfortunate story that shook Malaysia. It’s about the recent kidnapping of a 12-year old Dutch-Indian boy in Mont Kiara near Kuala Lumpur as he was on his way to school one day.

Nayati Moodliar kidnapped near his school on April 27th.

When I heard about the news, I was reminded of my 12-year old cousin whom I love so much and how mortified I would be if he was in Nayati’s place. That prompted me to share the news on my Facebook just like all the 11,000 or so Malaysians and everyone around the world.

It’s a sick tale and from the day that the news broke out, I hoped hard that the kidnappers took him for money and would call the parents to give them money in exchange for their boy. If that would be the case, then I don’t think anyone would think twice about giving his parents money if so happens they need it to get him back to them. But up until today, there is no news about his whereabouts.

Distraught parents

I fear the worse and my friend gave me her two cents on the situation.

She reasoned despite hoping that the boy will come home safely, his chances would be rather slim. I questioned her approach to this matter and insisted that it was a negative thought to have and that we should all be positive. But what she said next made me think.

“Although all these publicity is good to find the boy, it is also bad. Publicizing this would just spook the kidnappers out and make the process of transporting the boy to another place (perhaps outside of Malaysia) much quicker because they fear that the boy will be caught in a place where everyone know who this boy is from photos and what not. We don’t know what they want the boy for; to beg after being mutilated, to have his organs sold or other horrible things, but for whatever reason that may be, he is not in the country any more.

Even if he is [in the country], he might already have his hair shaven off or styled in a different way, perhaps malnourished to make him more thinner, thus more unrecognisable. There is a reason why kidnapping cases should be private and under the radar, and not spooking the kidnappers would be one of the reason.”

I feel that publicizing this is a great way to find the boy but listening to what my friend said, I too have a feeling that it may be too late, but I do hope it’s not. I do hope that they will give him back, they have to. This is not right.

It sickens me to the core to know that these people exist. It really does. And what is more sickening is that these kidnappers can be people whom you know; your neighbour, your doctor, your family member… You never know.

I wish I have the ability to find out the bad people in society and lock them up just in time before they make any more sick attempts on people. Seriously.

———————————————————-

Update; May 3rd – NAYATI IS RELEASED BY KIDNAPPERS!

Nayati has been released by his kidnappers and is back home safely with his family! Oh joy! I feared the worse, but thank his lucky stars that he came back home in one piece!!

I previously hoped that him being kidnapped is for ransom purposes and that his family will have to pay for his release, which is way better than knowing that he was abducted and transported to another country! And luckily, (though I mean, it is still so so horrible!) he was given back to his family after amount of money was paid off to the kidnappers.

All of us have been grinding our teeth, hoping that he’ll come back soon. I was so happy when I woke up and saw the headlines and status updates on Facebook on his safe return. SO HAPPY!

Nayati, back home safely with his family. Him hugging his sister. [Picture]

Beautiful, you’re so beautiful Malaysia.

Today is the day, the day of Bersih. Even though it would officially start in less than 12 hours (it’s 2.07am now), people have already gathered in Kuala Lumpur since 11pm or so. It’s crazy, but it’s so beautiful at the same time.

This post is not about Bersih though. I’m here to share a video about Malaysia and its beauty despite all the ugly that has surrounded us lately. Minus Bersih of course.

But anyway, enjoy the video. It is about the journey of two tourists who came to Malaysia, video by Javi Devitt. Such a wonderful video.

Here the video link.

Getting your first fuck.

“Did you pop your cherry yet?”

Okay well, technically that’s not how I get asked by people. Usually, it’s the straight-on “Have you ever fucked?” People are pretty blunt and straight forward these days. What happened to being subtle? Geez!

I got into an interesting conversation with a friend about how and where one should get their first fuck from. Okay, before I go any further, I’m going to use the term ‘First Fuck’. Let’s face it, the term ‘popping your cherry’ is cute, but we live in a world where the word fuck is highly celebrated and thus, it should be celebrated here as well. I’m sorry if you don’t find that word one bit sexy as I do.

Okay moving on.

Here’s a question.

What is the best way for one to lose their virginity?

Here are some of the ways that I thought about. Now, you may or may not agree with me, which is fine. You can give your input in the comment section, but this is my time, so let me shine! Okay, shut up Jasmine.

By the way, this is all about pre-marital sex. So if you plan to have sex after marriage (which is awesome, don’t get me wrong), then you should stop reading or you’d get tempted and I for one, do not want to be held responsible. Lol.

1. Doing it with a boyfriend/girlfriend

[Source]

This is pretty self-explanatory. You’re doing it with someone you care and who cares for you (or just care about getting into your pants?), which is great.

Doing it with an experienced boyfriend/girlfriend would mean that they can teach you a thing or two about sex. Or not. See, there are some people who like to share the knowledge and some don’t. Boo. The fact that they know what they’re doing may mean that you’d walk from an amazing first time experience or the opposite. Just don’t expect too much. Experienced people do not necessarily mean that they’re good. Just a heads up ;)

Doing it with an unexperienced boyfriend/girlfriend would probably mean that both of you can do shit wrong and it may not be as amazing as it should be. But let’s face it, the fact that both of you may not know anything is really comforting and less intimidating, so that’s pretty cool. And, both of you may also appreciate each other’s virginity more and are equally thankful (lol) for the experience.

2. Doing it with a friend

Experimenting with a friend is perhaps the most famous way of experimenting with sex and sexuality. [Source]

This idea may be pretty insane because you’re all, “My friend?”. Okay, maybe not ALL of us have that one friend who wants to desperately fuck you because they’re horny as fuck. I’m not saying that I have one. Okay, maybe I have one. I’m irresistible, what can I say? Haha.

Okay yes. If you have that one experienced friend who practically sleeps around or has an experience in the field (lol. Field?), then it’s a good thing to pop your cherry with them. First, he’s your friend so there’s no emotionally attachment there, like what you’d probably have with a boyfriend. I.e., “What if I’m not good? My boyfriend will leave me.” Basically, no complication there.

And because they’re your friend, the ideal situation here is that you guys may have a good laugh after doing it or before doing it. You can just jokingly say things like, “Don’t laugh when you see my ugly belly!” instead of being so serious and shit. AND they may give you a tip or two about sex too, which can be helpful for future reference. Get ready with your notes!

Or you can do it with a friend who’s never done it before and you guys can explore on stuff, which can be somewhat boring, but hey, it’s always fun to explore things together, especially when you guys are friends. But, I do predict an attachment if that happens. Like, what if because this is his first time and it’s apparently, mind blowingly amazing and he would want to, oh, I don’t know, have a relationship with you and you’re all, “But we’re just friends and he’s not my taste!” Vice versa.

With a friend who’s done it, you guys can just laugh it off. But I have to say that the outcome may not be like this. Ideally, it should. But it may not.

3. Doing it with a stranger

5 Best Ways to Get Rid of One Night Stands

You know the drill. One night stands, or more night stands. Up to you. You can find them anywhere. In the bar, on the Internet or the usual bus ride where you’d sit beside a hot guy and you’re all, “This guy is cute, totally brag-worthy in years to come.”

Okay, that’s plain wrong. Well, not really… Not if you’re desperate. Okay, we’ve all done it before.

But doing it with a stranger is quite both exciting and scary. One night stands aren’t always what you see in Sex and the City where the guy is always hot and it’s always okay to bring them to your home without having them to turn out to be a total psychopath.

My verdict for getting your first fuck with a stranger? Uhm, I don’t recommend it, especially for a first fuck. Personally, I hate to have the whole, “Oh, I lost my virginity to some guy in some club.”

4. Doing it with an animal

Moo?

What the fuck? Ew. No. Not that I’m judging you or anything. Wait, no. Ew. Fuck no. Do not do that!

5. Doing it with yourself or a toy

Natalie Portman’s masturbation scene in Black Swan, probably one of my favourite scenes ever because well, the mom was just beside her.

Pretty toys no? It’s so colourful.

Now this, this is good. Okay, well, technically, you’re not losing your virginity or anything, which is the main aim of this post, but it is somewhat losing your virginity. Okay, well not really. But the whole aim of sex, aside from the whole gropping, making out and stuff, is to reach orgasm and you can still get it from masturbation no? Yes, it may not be the same and yes, some people may laugh at you for opting for masturbation instead of the real thing, but really though, NO PRESSURE.

If you’re not ready to fuck, then don’t fuck.

If some of you think that, “Yes, yes I’m ready. I’ve been so horny lately and I want to fuck someone. I’m sick of holding on to this dreaded thing. I just want to get over and done with! I want to know what it feels like!” Then, by all means, go ahead. But if you do feel this way and couldn’t do it in the end, then it means that you’re not ready just yet and it’s okay.

But really though, this post is not all about ways for you to lose your virginity. Yes, it may be, but not solely on that.

The whole point of this post is to tell you that while sex and getting your first fuck may be exciting, don’t pressure yourself so much into doing it. I know a lot of nymphomaniacs and satyriasis friends who told me that deep down, despite being happy that they know about the wonders of sex, they hoped that they did with someone they like or care about; especially those who did it with someone other than the person they have feelings with.

Don’t get so wined up with the whole, “You’re 25 and you’re still a virgin????” thing. It’s bullshit. There are a lot of virgins out there but they just don’t say it out loud because it’s not ‘cool’ to be a virgin these days. You may think that EVERYBODY is doing it, but they’re not, trust meeeehhhh. Especially the ones that talk about sex or sexual stuff all the time. All those perverted, otak kuning people! You know who you are! You talk about sex so much but never actually experienced it. It’s not a sad thing really. Sex is a fun topic to talk about, but it’s not something that you’d jump into just because you like talking about it.

It’s just like how you would adore a celebrity’s face because it’s pretty or whatever. It doesn’t mean that just because you like their face, you would want to go to a plastic surgeon and actually have the celebrity’s face on you. You get me? ;)

I know I’m contradicting myself here, but that’s just it. If you want to have sex, go have sex, good for you. But if you’re not ready for sex, then you’re not ready for sex, good for you. Either way, it’s your body, take charge of it. Don’t let the media or peer pressure determine how you should use it.

Most importantly though, if you do decide to pop your cherry, be safe! Don’t believe in the whole, “I don’t have sex a lot” thing from your partner when he/she declines using condom. Remember, it only takes one person to give you STDs. Screw sensation! The last thing you want is to find out is that you only have a few years to live.

But scary thoughts aside, enjoy sex. Be safe, but enjoy it. Have fun ;)

A LITTLE NOTE FROM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS THE ‘FIELD’:

“Having sex is better and more amazing if it was imperfect. If it happened like in the movies or in porn, I’m quite sure it wouldn’t be great. Like all the actual emotions would be missing. It’s like, it matters more when like say, in the middle of doing it, something happens and both of you start giggling or something. You’ll remember it better that way than say, if it went just like in the movies.” ~ F

There you go. I guess, if you’re so into making everything perfect, you wouldn’t enjoy is as much because you’re so pressured to making it so darn perfect, and often times, it doesn’t happen that way. I suppose, there is no such thing as a perfect first time, so don’t beat yourself over it if it’s not what you’d define as ‘perfect’.

[This post was originally published on October 5, 2011]

The math

My work load.

1,500 word essay due Monday (April 30th)

2,000 word essay due Monday (May 7th)

1,500 word essay due Wednesday (May 9th)

2,000 word essay due Friday (May 11th)

So,

1,500 + 2,000 + 1,500 + 2,000 = 7,000 words.

Which means,

Four days until first essay is due. Three essays in a week.

Hence,

I need to start doing them now or I’ll die a tragic death of sleep deprivation.

Which would result to,

Less concentration, high chance of failing for lack of concentration and dedication.

My only answer to that is,

URGH!

School sucks.

Some positive things that would drive me to do my work though!

- Bigger room

- A window to look outside when I get bored (I was windowless last semester)

- A comfy chair

- Internet

- My school library open even during the weekends

- The thought of failing a class

Yay.

An Imagined Reality – #2 Car, The Alone

The joy of having a car; be it your first, second or tenth, is a joy unlike any other. Perhaps it’s the joy of mobility that derives from the ownership of a car. Perhaps, it’s something more primitive such as the joy of security on your various everyday journeys. That just might be it. Protection. Survival. To not get killed at the first impact of a crash. Funny though, for us to buy that form of protection only to protect it as much as we can from protecting us. No dents, no scratches and, ideally, no crash whatsoever. The ideal car to many is one that looks just like it did on the first day it was bought. Ironic.

Yet, in our protectiveness of the car, we deprive the car of something great – intimacy from its own kind. Have you ever walked to your car in the car parks of some shopping mall and see lines and rows of cars parked ever so close to each other and think, so close yet so far? I have. And I can’t help feel lonely at the thought. Heart wrenching.

Cars go about everyday seeing one another on the roads, the streets, off-road, across bridges and more. But that’s all that they do – see but not touch. For to touch another of its own, regardless of how much they love that other one, it brings about damage. Even if that touch was done with the greatest amount of tender loving car, it would only result in a scratch, a dent and, essentially, hurt for the other. That’s a tough life to go through. The deprivation to express oneself is a pain beyond the definitions any physical form of pain. Worst of all, cars go through this simply because they are the victims of circumstance. Not by choice.

When I’m in a car and not driving, I look out the window and look at the other cars that pass by, thinking of the many cars out there yet each as a singular entity, never in pairs or groups. Cars. They exist in plural yet they live single. That’s loneliness in its essence. And as if the irony isn’t enough, cars often have on an expression. Mostly, they look neutral, bar the few that look emotionally extreme.

I see the grill, the bumper, the headlights and everything else that forms that face of a car and tell myself, that’s just the you shown for our sake. What about the you inside? Perhaps one day, I’d be fortunate enough to find a car that will tell me. But for now, I shall sit by the curbs and stare at parked cars. Not to find a car willing to tell me its feelings but to perhaps catch that one secretive moment when a car touches another car even at the expense of a scratch or a dent and say well done. For trying to reach out even if it hurts. For having the courage to not be a willing victim of cruel circumstance.

P.S – Perhaps that’s where the dents and scratch that you never knew what happened came from. Don’t frown at it. See the other side of that physical contact – a tender touch between two beings that will always hurt one another.

——————————————————————————

Precise yet unpredictable. Confident yet insecure. Self-doubting yet self-assured. Dickson lives in a constant paradox, finding both comfort and torment within his thoughts.

Interested to be a guest writer?

The art of being different

You know what I want to be?

I want to be those deep people whom you see in movies with their notepad and pen, sitting somewhere, just observing and drawing people or places. They seem so mysterious and intellectual, as if they know something about the world and we don’t. They are hard to figure out which either makes them an interesting person to be around with or an annoying one; the kind that would make you fucking frustrated.

I met someone who’s like that before. He used to be such an interesting person to talk to and he frustrates the shit out of me because he just makes everything hard. Every little detail about someone, about their movements and actions, he would make such a big deal about it and that’s frustrating. What’s worse is that he constantly criticize people for everything and he looks at himself as being the perfect being of some sort. But of course, that is never true.

Complicated Mind by Eugeniaervi

He is flawed.

But after a while, things with him became so easy. He was not as trivial and mysterious any more because well, I finally figured him out. He finds it rather annoying at first but proceeded to be in awe with my ability to finally ‘figure him out’. He finds that incredibly astonishing.

And then slowly, he finds me rather boring to entertain. As do I with him. And we just slowly… drift a part. There’s no spark between us any more. No drama, no mystery. Everything just became… normal. I’m still figuring out whether I have figured him out or whether he just stopped being himself. Maybe he grew out of it? Maybe things just became to fucking complicated and he’s sick of it? Or maybe, it was because of the earlier thought of mine; that I simply have just figured him out.

Nonetheless, this does not stop me from wanting to be that mysterious person though. It’s interesting. It allows you to see people from a different perspective. A twisted one, but one nonetheless. I guess what’s interesting is that you get to be the odd one out, someone who goes against the flow and you just observe how people break down because of that.

When someone cannot figure out someone else, it’s either they keep trying or quit; either they treat you badly or treat you good. I mean, it’s interesting how so easy people get upset over things that, often time, is not important and that is what I learn from him or rather, what I learn from interacting with him all this time.

I wish I could be deep and emotionless; not bothered by what people do or think of me. I’d just look at them, smile and move on.

But then again, that’s just me, you know.

Stop caring!

When I was younger, I remember being so into reading magazine articles that have headlines such as ‘What Men Want In Women‘ or ‘Are you his ideal woman?‘. Or one of those, ‘50 Romantic Things To Do With Your Man‘ things.

And more!

• How to make him like you. (Proven facts!)
• Make him wild in bed!
• How to be incredibly successful without doing anything!
• How to be awake and continue being awake at work.
• 5 Ways to not fart in public
• How to save yourself by not saving yourself but still want to save yourself! (So true!)

I might have gotten a bit excited with these lists. But you catch my drift. It’s ridiculous!

When I was a teenager (which was not THAT long ago! Lol!), I literally have a whole folder of cut-outs from magazine pages and printed articles of these things, nicely arranged with pictures of happy couples and super hot hunks. I kid you not! In fact, I still have it and would gladly (though, shamefully) snap a picture of it if I didn’t tug it nicely in my cupboard back in KK which I have mentally labelled it as my teenage life pile.

To make things worst, I even own a list of traits that make out my ideal guy, written by my 14-year-old self! Fourteen! Can you believe that???!!

Oh the hormones and the crazy amount of chick flicks!

I think I can remember some of the things I wrote in that list!

• Taller than me
• Really sweet
• Romantic
• Cute
• A gentleman
• Charming
• Ambitious
• Loves me for me

And the list goes on. It’s ridiculous. It’s most ridiculous especially when there is no such thing as a PERFECT or IDEAL person. At least, 100%.

Growing up though, I did come to a realization that these lists of traits and what makes a perfect moment etcetera not real. I mean, they are applicable to SOME people, but seeing that there are a billion people in the world and we are all individuals, it’s quite obvious that this list does not represent EVERYONE, it merely represents some of us of which this list (which I am certain was from a survey of some sort) was directed to.

Do I make sense? Meh.

I mean, I’m sure there are lists talking about the ideal woman being a total Barbie; tall, slim, blonde etc… but seeing as that I have neither these traits but am instead someone who is off average height, plus size, jet black hair with hints of brown and yet, have acquired an interest from one or two fine guys out there, I did realized that this list is incorrect or rather, not quite applicable to some people.

And that makes me feel happy quite frankly.

There is also this ‘rule’ I read where girls should always play hard to get and not be the first one to make a move. That’s not true. So what then? Girls should instead wait for the guy to approach her and while doing so, wonder ever so crazily about when he would do that only to find out that he will never approach her? While, mind you, rejecting every single guy who is interest in her just because he was waiting for that one guy to approach her? Whoa!

You shouldn’t do that!

If you find someone interesting, approach the guy, talk to him and see if your time with him is worthwhile and whether anything would happen with him. If not, move on. You waste less time wondering and more time getting to know more guys.

But then again, I do acknowledge that not everyone can do this; whether you are a woman or man. It’s hard. I find it hard as well. In theory, it’s an easy and fair thing to consider, but in practise, it can be quite challenging. In other worse, it’s easier said than done.

Okay, I’m going off topic.

The ideal woman = You. Always.

I guess what I’m saying is that these lists that magazines have, well, they’re not all real. They’re good for reference purposes but they are not to be taken so seriously on. If you have an urge to approach a guy but feel obliged to stay to the rule of thou shouldn’t approach a man first for thou is a woman, then I suggest that you ignore that list and carry on with what your heart desires!

I’ve seen a lot of my girl friends wanting ever so desperately to get to know a guy but decided that they should wait for the guy to approach them instead only to find out that he’s not the guy for her. OR those women who try so hard to be the perfect girl only to find out that guys dig girls who are completely the opposite of her.

You get me?

So be wild and free!

I think the only thing that is correct in these lists is the part where it says that confidence is sexy. That is unquestionably true. ;)

Speaking about list, here’s an AWESOME list that I definitely think you should read because I approve of it. :P

‘Ten Ways To Get A Guy To Chase After You‘

The age obsession.

I used to be so obsessed with age. If you’re younger than me, I’ll treat you a certain way; I’ll act more mature and poised, more ‘adult’-like, if you like. If you’re older than me, I’ll act as matured as possible to let you know that I am worth talking to, that just because I am younger, doesn’t mean I can’t play with the big boys/girls.

But as you grow older however, you tend to realize that maturity (or immaturity) does not tie itself with age. No, no. In fact, the term ‘age is just a number‘ has never been any truer, especially in this context.

See, after a while, you tend to realize that you are not confined to your same-age domain any more, just like how you were confined in primary school and high school. Back in school, your classmates are the same age as you, so you sort of allowed yourself to be wild around them but act a certain way in the presence of those younger or older than you.

But when you reach university or work however, this ‘confinement’ is broken and you are forced to roam around the world, mixing yourself with people who might just be 2 or 3 years apart from you, or 50 years apart. Not only that, but your sense of judgement towards age and personality might jumble up as well.

The young may be the most experienced and matured, while the old may very well be the opposite.

It took me a while to ‘open up’ myself to this idea, but once I did that, I realized that age does not matter any more. Once our personalities match, everything else just falls into place. This I mean, is when it comes to building friendships. I do occasionally catch myself putting a certain barrier with someone younger than me though, but I would quickly forget about it and act normal.

Same goes to immature older people too. I mean, if you act silly and funny, it’s fine; we all have the kid in us. But when you act like a total ass and bullshit your way through things; acting like a total child, then my respect for you will dry up pretty fast. Faster than fast.

What bugs me the most are those people who think that age is EVERYTHING. I have a friend who’s older than me by a year or two and she constantly brings up her age when it comes to making decisions or criticizing my friends’ (including myself) behaviour.

“We should do this. I should know, I’m more experienced since I’m older.”

“I’m older, so I get to choose.”

“Kids these days… Tsk tsk…”

“I guess I’m the only adult here!”

“Oh please. You’re younger, you don’t know anything.”

ANNOYING!

And then there’s that younger person who values someone older’s opinion just because they are older and it will be best of us ‘young people’ to listen to him/her. It’s good to a certain extent because it shows respect, but it’s annoying if you overdo it, you know?

“I don’t care what you tell me. I’m going to listen to my boyfriend. He’s older.”

“Jasmine, you make the decision for the group, we can’t be bothered since we’re too tired. And besides, YOU’RE the older one.” (because everyone is so lazy to do their part of the job)

Come on! That’s just ridiculous!

Seriously, if we get sooooo age-concerned, the world will fall a part! Nobody wants to work with someone younger because they are inexperienced, therefore, useless. Nobody would want to work with someone older because they (the younger ones) would always be looked down upon because of their age.

How is this not fucked up?

Just because I’m younger, doesn’t mean I’ve never been through things and just because you’re older, doesn’t mean you’re fucking mature. For all I know, my 12-year old cousin may be more matured and considerate than your 30-year old ass!

Just sayin’.