Want to know if he’s the one? Have period sex.

DO IT. You know you want to!

Ladies! I have a question…

What are your thoughts on period sex? Or rather, what are your thoughts on how casual and in control a man is when handling blood on the sheets? I mean, I’ve freaked out so many times when that happens but nothing screams SEXY than a man telling you to “calm down, let me handle this” and proceeds to the toilet only to come out with a wet towel and some toothpaste to rub the stained sheets with.

I MEAN. Can I marry you already?

He has every right to scream his head off at the sight of blood or walk away and let me handle it, but NO. Boy actually told me to relax and proceeded to deal with the blood.

OH MY LORD. YES.

hot

Not only that, but post cleaning (or post not being freaked out), he still goes to you and takes you in like you’re the hottest creature around – bleeding or not.

WHY HELLO.

Or there would be occasions where you would have your period and you’re super horny (because it happens, duh). You’d tell him how you’re feeling but then sort of brush it off and say “but never mind, I don’t want to dirty your towels or anything” but then he says, “Well, there’s always shower sex. Let’s do that.”

blown

Okay, maybe it’s just me but I’m pretty sure there are other women out there who would agree that these instances are kinda sorta hot. A man still wanting you despite knowing that you’re bleeding your vagina out? YES PLEASE!

You might be thinking, “But Jasmine, you can’t really expect all men to like period sex or like the idea of involving them with your period”. Well sure, I don’t. We’re still human beings after all and I get that not everyone fancy the sight of blood on their penis, but at least they’re respectful about it.

Have you ever met a man who isn’t? I have.

He said that if I was ever on my period, I shouldn’t tell him because it would just disgust the shit out of him. “I wouldn’t even want to touch you, let alone be in the same room with you. I’m sorry, but that’s just me.” I’ve never felt so ugly and insulted in my life. It’s like I am this dirty and disgusting creature just because I’m experiencing one of mother nature’s most natural thing.

And yet he has the nerve to say something so archaic like “women are vessels of life. Your job is to bring life in this world and to take care of the home, while us men bring back the money”. As a ‘vessel of life’, I’d say that it’s quite ironic that you get disgusted by my period when it is an indication of my fertility.

That aside, I do know some women (and their partners) not liking the whole idea of period sex or period (anything)sex(ual) and that’s alright. Some women feel that period is a personal thing and shouldn’t be toyed around, nothing wrong with that too. I fully respect you and your opinion on the matter.

However for the rest of us who do toy with the idea, well, what do you think? Is period sex hot or not? To those who have never done it, would you at least try once? Let me know!

All for period sex!

Advertisements

Ladies, where your condoms at?

“It’s the man’s job to provide the condom”, this guy said to me once.

While I find this extremely admirable and sexy (because he prioritizes my sexual health as well as his), I do find it problematic.

Women, just as much as men, SHOULD be responsible in preparing/buying/providing their own condoms too. I have to be honest, I carry condoms in my purse all the time because you never know when you need to use it!

As women, we need to take charge of our bodies and sexual activities by being able to have the power to say, “Hey, I have a condom, let’s use it!“. I have been in situations where the men I was with did not have a condom with them but still wanted to have sex with me. “It’s okay, I’m clean. I always get myself checked every 3 months, so you don’t have to worry about it”.

Uhm okay sure, but no.

Yes, it feels good and undeniably kind of sexy to fuck without a condom, however, you’re talking about MY body and MY pleasure here so can we have some respect and go by MY rules too?

dominant-men

It’s definitely empowering and sexy when you get to be the one to steer the wheel. Sure, as a society, we’ve been programmed to think that men should be the one to dominate while the women follow and although this isn’t necessarily wrong, it’s definitely important to consciously remember that it shouldn’t always have to be this way.

Whether it be dictating sexual positions, fulfilling needs or being the one to decide whether to use protection or not, both individuals should and must be able to exercise their rights in order to create a positive sexual experience for both.

All for positive sexual experience!

 

20 things I learned from Tinder

A few months ago, I got out of a long term relationship. It took me another few more months before deciding that I should probably throw myself out there again.

Naturally, Tinder came into the picture. I’ve heard so much about it so I thought I’d give it a try. (Hey, why not!)

Here are 20 lessons that I’ve learned from using Tinder (in no particular order).

  1. Be careful what you write on your profile, your friends, colleagues or boss might come across it. Unless you’re traveling and Tindering, then who cares what you write on there!
  2. Not everyone takes Tinder seriously, so don’t get too bothered if they don’t reply you.
  3. It’s a pretty cool ‘dating’ app to vet out unwanted messages from weirdos or people you are not attracted to.
  4. It’s also a pretty cool app to use when to meet locals while you’re traveling. (I should use it when I travel tbh)

    opener-tinder0216
    Image from ‘What I Learned Tindering My Way Across Europe
  5. On that note, as a local, you get to meet travelers visiting your city (major plus to living in exotic Borneo). I love showing people around my city, plus, it’s always fun to hear their travel stories too.
  6. There aren’t many choices on Tinder in KK unfortunately. 3 swipes and you’re done for the day!
  7. Important Tinder lesson: Tinder, just like dating, is a game. So, don’t get too attached with anyone you meet there. You may potentially get hurt or disappointed and tbh, it’s not worth it.

  8. Just… PLAY.IT.COOL. Yes he’s hot, but don’t fully commit yourself to someone, it may come across as being weird or trying too hard.
  9. Protection is key (you know what I mean). Make sure you have your own too!
  10. PAY FOR YOUR OWN MEALS. It’s 2016! Who waits for a guy to pay for your food?? It may be a date, but nothing screams sexy than a woman taking care of herself! If he does insist on paying, then cool, if not, then you know what to do!
  11. Stop going out of your way to provide for them. You’re not their SO and you barely know them. Be nice and help out where you can, but don’t impose. They’re not your responsibility.
  12. Learn some valuable skills while you’re at it. Flirting for example (amongst other things) is a great skill to practice with your date.flirting_old_photo_600x369
  13. Yes, you can make friends through Tinder (eventually), but remember what Tinder is about. It’s first and foremost a hook up app and people who get on there may expect sex (spoiler alert!). Not all, but most do. So keep that in mind when your date pulls the whole “want to have some fun?”
  14. Getting matched with someone who is way out of your league isn’t too bad, especially if just like me, you’re shit at approaching cute guys in real life social settings.

  15. I’ve met some really cool guys on Tinder, many of which I’ve became good friends with and still keep in touch via social media.
  16. However, don’t get offended if someone does not want to keep in touch with you, even if both of you had a great connection. They have their reasons, I guess. It’s a shitty fact, but it happens.
  17. Getting ghosted or stood up is part of the dating/Tinder game and it sucks balls.

    635903862810063381989343265_ghosting

  18. You’ll definitely have some interesting Tinder stories to tell your friends – or date! Talking about them definitely makes a great conversation during the date.
  19. Always make your safety a priority. Whether you’ve known them for a day or a month, it’s still very important to put your safety a priority when you do meet them in person. You know how this goes – meet at a public place, tell people where you are at, give them emergency number etc. Safety first!

  20. Have fun! No experience is bad experience; everyone you meet, everything you experienced, it all contribute to you learning about yourself. I for one definitely learned a lot about myself and of others through this whole Tinder journey and that’s pretty awesome. (Lol at journey)

Do you have anything to put on the list? Share your thoughts by commenting below!

Till then, happy Tindering!

Dear Young Me

Dear young me,

Thank you for not being desperate to be accepted. Thank you for not trading your real friends for a group of cool-looking people who look like they have all the fun in the world. Also, thank God there was no Instagram or you and I both would be SO jealous looking at those people!

Yes, I know how much you wanted to be part of their group, but I also know that it’s probably not a good idea to come from a single-parent family and have unrealistic need to spend money on parties and booze on a weekly basis at just 17! I mean, we can afford it now but not when we were younger!

Also, thank you for realizing at such a young age that while the grass may be greener on the other side, it is also no less greener on this side despite us having a hard time believing that. Yes, I know it’s hard but we managed, didn’t we?

And yes, I know you’re sad that you don’t a boyfriend and that sucks… a lot! But trust me, there’s nothing wrong with you. No, it’s not that people find you unattractive, or not charming enough or unintelligent, or that you don’t have a sense of humour.

It’s just that, boys can be really blind sometimes and whether you like it or not, you can’t really blame them. They’re used to society’s definition of beauty, one that we unfortunately, do not fit into. But hey, we have an advantage to that, you know! We get to see their real selves and intentions; how pretentious and mean they can be to get the girl they want or how really nice, sweet and respectful some guys are. They think nobody sees them, but we do. I think it’s pretty cool that we get to open their minds to different types of beauty that surprise, surprise, surrounds them. In fact, being the size that we are, we get to appreciate people more and ignore those who do not deserve us; friends and boys included.

And honestly, we are single because nobody caught our eyes yet! It was never about us being unattractive, it’s about us being unattracted! You know and I know that whenever we find someone attractive, we would be the first one to say hi and ask them silly, unimportant life questions. Honestly, do you even care about how the weather will be like next week? We are definitely not the type of girls who will just sit there and wait for her prince charming to come, we go find him!

Oh and yeah, we suck at grades. Pretty bad actually. Lucky thing we got A1 for English and BM. That was pretty cool. But don’t worry because you will do REALLY good in Uni. Trust me. Also, remember those cool kids? Well, you’d be happy to know that no, you did not join their circle but because you created your own cool, they did acknowledge you and even surprisingly, praised you for being, well, you. Weird.

One of them even came up to you randomly and asked, “You’re Jasmine, right?”

Yes, yes I am.

– Older, wiser and sexier you

 

 

Real problems only introverted extroverts (and extroverted introverts) would understand

Introverted extroverts are the life of the party. You are a social animal who loves meeting new people and have people be super interested to get to know you. You are charismatic, fun and enjoyable to be around with.

However, there are time when all you want to do is be cooped up in your rooms, to not be the centre of attention and to for once, be the quiet one in the group. You just don’t have the mood to mingle and tend to get awfully awkward with people. This confuses people very much but hey, that’s okay!

Here are some real problems only introverted extroverts would understand.

  • You have a ‘fun quota’

tumblr_mq7iro4B481sqaouio1_500

Being an extrovert can be tiring. You enjoy it very much but sometimes, especially times when you use too much of your ‘fun quota’, you get tired and tend to crawl back to your holes to re-energize yourselves.

However, don’t worry because you know that once you are fully energized, you can’t wait to go out and start mingling again! So, get ready world!

  • You have a lot of friends, but only a handful of close friends

tumblr_ndlziqwOMe1t1prrio1_500

You like to keep our circle small, despite having a large network of friends and acquaintances. You are usually selective when it comes to who you share your deepest darkest secrets to and try not to blabber everything about yourself to just about everyone.

But having said that, you do have many groups of friends that you hang with many different interests and stories that you share with, and that’s the awesome part! You can never have too little friends or the party would be a bore!

  • Avoiding people

hiding-behind-a-tree1

When you’re not feeling it, all you want to do is to avoid people at all cause. See a friend you got drunk with the other night in the shopping mall? Avoid! See that crush you’ve been flirting non-stop with at the dinner party last week in the petrol station? Avoid!

But wait! They see you and now they’re walking to you. You can’t run any more so you put the biggest smile you can and go, “HEY!!!!! I’m so happy to see you!”.

Talking to them isn’t too bad after all, but once they go away, you run and make sure you don’t bump into them ever again. Well, at least until next Saturday at the bar!

  • People throw stuff at you all the time

giphy

Because of your fun and outspoken personality, people tend to make you do things a lot. I.e., do presentations, emcee for events, public speaking, confronting people etc etc… In reality, there are some things in the list that you rather not do.

I for one hate confronting people, I am too scared to do the job!

  • “You? Shy?????”

shy

Yep, you get that ALL the time. Apparently, nobody believes that you could ever be shy, but it does happen!

  • You’re a ball of surprises!

884865

You know those girls who don’t wear make-up at all and have zero fashion sense almost all the time, then when you see them at a party, BAM! They look gorgeous with their sex-me make-up and fuck-me clothes.

Yeah, you’re kind of like that.

When you’re not feeling it, you keep quiet and lay low. Everyone pass you without noticing. Nobody thinks that you’re important enough. Then there’s that one person in the room who is super hyper that it’s fucking pissing you off. You want to shine too, just like her/him, but you can’t. You just can’t. Not right now anyway.

Then one day… BAM! Your personality kicks in and your fun side is shown! You become the life of the room and everyone notices you, even that annoyingly hyper girl/boy shuts up because the limelight is on you now and there’s nothing they can do about it. You hear people saying, “I didn’t know you’re this fun!” as dance your ass off to Carly Rae Jepson’s I Really Like You.

You do you now, you hear?

ssW9GXY

Self discovery means throwing yourself everywhere.

Okay so, I have 4 jobs now.

Yes, FOUR. How? Why? Well, I think it has a lot to do with me trying to not freak myself out as much for not knowing that I want to do in life.

People say you tend to figure out about things after graduating from university. Sure, but not for everyone. For the most part, some of us are still figuring out and trying to see where we fit and stuff.

So how do you figure out?

...by drinking someone's overpriced drink? Perhaps!
…by drinking someone’s overpriced drink? Perhaps!

I believe in waiting for the next big thing to come knocking at your door, but don’t wait too long. Reality check, it may or may not come. Sometimes you get a big break, other times, you need to do a lot in order to get (and know) that big break. It’s better to go out there and find it, what I think.

For the second half of 2014, right after university, I was basically figuring things out. I was traveling a lot (‘traveling’ meant going back to my second home; KL – I was and still is based in KK) despite not having much money, though I saved as much as I can from my monthly pocket money thanks to my parents – less than RM300 a month. Other times when I’m back in KK, I would stay at home, a lot, and do the normal things that jobless people do – eat, sleep, rave, repeat.

Have you ever been so bored that you find posing with big ass fruits more exciting?
Have you ever been so bored that you find posing with big ass fruits more exciting?

When December rolled in and I basically still didn’t know what I wanted to do – I mean, I had an idea but you know, I wasn’t sure – I knew I had to start the new year with at least a paying job. So I managed to secure a part time job and one thing let to another, I now have 4 part time jobs that covers a few hours of my weekends and weekday nights. Pretty insane but pretty cool  too actually.

Now, whenever people ask me what I do for a living, I can proudly say I have 4 jobs; part time jobs, sure, but jobs. That’s always a great conversation starter, hah!

Bare in mind, if you do plan to have multiple jobs (part time or not), make sure you can keep up to it! I survived Week 1, so I guess that’s okay. (I GUESS!)

My 2015 resolution is ‘GROWTH‘.

10937417_10153129370273083_856705887_n

Honestly, I don’t know what growth I am aiming for this year, but at least I am getting paid for it. Wink wink! Okay, bad example, but you know what I mean.

I am still new at this whole 4 jobs thing, but I’ve friends who were in the same boat as me and they pretty much threw themselves out there and one thing led to another, they found their ‘calling’ and the rest is history! It’s that snowball effect, you know. You start here, then you get to know some people, get into some things and liked it, pursue it further and make it into a passion. Now one of them earn a 5 figure income! WHOA!

It’s all about experimenting, people! Keeping things exciting ;)

"Look ma! I'm on a brochure!!" - A job in the marketing department of my university led me to be a talent scout for brochures to eventually be THE talent! Something to add to the resume eh!
“Look ma! I’m on a brochure!!” – A job in the marketing department of my university led me to be a talent scout for brochures to eventually THE talent! Something to add to the resume eh!

That nails tho! Hehe.

Anyway, wherever you are and whatever you do this point of your life, and no matter whether you’ve figured things out or have not, I wish you the all the best! 

Hello from Indonesia!

New friend made during our hike at Batutumonga hill.

Hey guys!

Sorry for the lack of update lately. With graduation week followed by two weeks away in Indonesia, it’s almost impossible for me to keep up with my blog – let alone have you to keep up with me!

But as I sit here seeing my friends practice for our performance tonight, I can’t help but think about how I should SHOULD tell you guys what has been up.

GRADUATION – 23rd November

I finally graduated and a legit Bachelor of Arts graduate!

10411136_10152526865424366_8832683952880647133_n

1932231_10152526864419366_2271082921823745888_n

The day after my graduation, I had to go to the airport early in the morning for my big 2-week study trip to Indonesia – specific Makassar and Toraja in South Sulawesi!

‘In Search of Makassar & Toraja’ – 24th Nov to 7 Dec

It’s already towards the end of our journey and boy was it a great one! Some highlights during our trip.

I will hopefully get to talk more about my trip once I get hold of pictures. But for now, feel free to go through the links as well as our trip’s blog as a whole. There are TONS of really interesting posts there as well as daily videos for you :)

Here are some pictures so far!

10478543_10152999047268083_2316113133395320297_n

10850519_10153008801358083_681652919_n

10676164_10153000683943083_8159007937653406932_n

10801911_10153000657763083_1979192501520850310_n

Will update more soon! Till then, take care!!!