IF ONLY: The perfect partner

“If only you were slimmer, I would totally date you.”

Ouch :(

I have always had this sort of shit thrown at me. In some guys’ eyes, I am the so-called, perfect girl. But there’s only one teenie tiny problem, “Oh, nothing too big of a problem,” he says, that I’m not a size 8 and below.

See, for them, I am beautiful, funny, charming, vivacious, witty and independent – their words, not mine – but it seems that the only thing that is between them and their need to make a move on me is my weight.

“It’s a matter of preference. Everybody has their own preference, that’s just mine.”

Fair enough.

Well, I guess there is truth in that. I for one, prefer guys who are into curvaceous girls like me so it wouldn’t be awkward for me to love myself and my body excessively while he hates the sight of it. I prefer him to love it too and tell me that I’m beautiful just the way I am without having his eyes twitch every time he says that.

So here is my ‘IF ONLY’.

“If only he was into curvy girls.”

All this while, I never realize that weight could put a barrier between being friends and being, well, more than friends. It’s annoying really and pathetic, but it’s true. Yes, it is mean, but that’s just how we are built somehow, so despite hating the idea behind this whole weight is an issue for me thing, I have to realize that there is some truth behind it.

So I decided to head to Facebook and ask my friends about it. What are their ‘if only’ in a guy or a girl. All of them went deep inside their memory box to give me an answer. Old memories resurfaced; some expressed annoyance, regret and some even anger – which I never intended to happen.

I have to say, I blame myself for not giving the proper definition to my request. I meant to say in terms of preference, the general “If only he/she is open to my liberal thoughts” sort of thing. So most of them told me things that regretted them with their previous relationships or love interests, which was fine for me. I am incredibly thankful that they’re sharing that story of theirs with me and now, with you.

Anyway, here are the results.

“If only he can get my pervetedness and lameness beyond my flabs.” | “If only he wasn’t so crazy about K-pop!”  – Sheryl

“If only he wasn’t so daft!” – Sierra

“If only he/she would open up and be more friendly.” – On Ee

“If only he wasn’t a jerk.” – Andrea

“If only he wasn’t so egoistic and narcissistic” – Christine

“If only she approached me and says hi, then I will make the next move.” – Flanegan

“If only he/she would stop being afraid.” – Nelson

“If only he isn’t extremely depressed to the point of pushing me away.” – XE

“If only he wasn’t so shy and would speak up.” – Gwen

“Two words. Proper English!” – Fabian

“If only she doesn’t smoke.” – Kenneth

“If only he admits I am never wrong and always right! Hahaha!” – Sharon

“If only he didn’t gave up.” – Nadia

“If only she wasn’t a cheater.” – Hazli

Thank you for participating guys!

Sadness and anger aside, here are other pretty funny ‘If Only’s  that I came up with.


If only she likes my tattoos.


If only she let’s me play dress up with her.


If only he wasn’t fake.


If only she wasn’t fake.


If only he could do this with a straight face and is okay that I think it’s sexy.


If only she doesn’t have all that shit on her shit.


If only she was into fulfilling my fantasies.


If only he loves vaginas.

Haha!

Now tell me readers, what is your ‘If Only’?

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2 thoughts on “IF ONLY: The perfect partner

Sprinkle me

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