Faith

FAITH

1. Complete trust or confidence in someone or something.
2. Strong belief in God or in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof.

I consider myself as a free thinker who is still somewhat connected to my Catholic upbringing. I was born and raised as a Catholic, but never really attended church or embraced my spiritual side as much as other people I know.

Growing up, religion was not really my biggest interest or favourite just because I was angry at people who abused the religion and proclaimed themselves as ‘spiritual guiders’ to this religion and other religions as well.

I’ve seen a bumper sticker that pretty much sums my whole disinterest towards religion. “I don’t have a problem with God, it’s his fan club that I don’t like“, which I think is absolutely true.

I have been indirectly forced and pressured to convert to another branch of Christianity. Pulled in by a group of some cult by showing me some ‘real facts’ that they comfortably pulled out from Wikipedia. I met some religious people who pretty much demonized and discriminated other people just because it does not go in line with their faith; homosexual people for example – this happens all the time don’t it?

So, I’m sorry if religion is not really my biggest interest and it’s not because I am not for religion, I am. But it’s these people who ruined it for me. It’s these crazy ‘fans’ who made everything scary for me. I was once forced by a friend to go to her church so that she could ‘clean me up from my sins’ just because I am very liberal in my thoughts.

How weird is that?

But of course, I do very much understand that not everybody who is strongly connected to their faith are like these people. It would be unfair to those who are completely normal and kept their faith to their ownselves to simply generalize them and ultimately, demean their belief just because their fellow faith-lovers did such things.

Those other people are what we call radicals and you’re not like that. You may be proud of your religion, but at the same time, you understand that other religions are just as beautiful too, so you don’t force people to take in your religion and embrace it.

I use to find people who are religious as being ridiculous just because I think our lives are not based on what God wants us to do, but what we can do for ourselves. If you want to pass a test, you can’t just pray to God and just sit there and not put an effort to do anything. That’s just stupid.

But as I grow up, I came to realize that despite how ridiculous and clichéd I think religion is at times, with how it would change someone to become radicals, I cannot ignore the fact that there are those who are not radicals, and who truly believes that their faith is what keep them moving and going strong in this world.

You may believe in good luck charms to give you luck, or your friends to give you hope or your family or pet to give you love, but you can’t deny the fact that religion is also just as important to someone who centers their lives around it to feel loved, accepted, appreciated and understood.

With this thought, I stopped finding religious people ridiculous, instead, I tend to respect them. We all need something to believe in and feel at home with something or someone when no one else is there. They find God as being their ultimately comfort zone and that’s totally okay. They feel that no one else can understand them aside from God himself.

For some, like me, my faith is myself. I’d pad my back (figuratively) if I did a good job or make myself feel good again if I did a sucky job. Some may say that being my own best friend is depressing and lonesome, but I kind of like it.

I suppose, that is why I write a lot and get lost in my own thoughts, because it makes me feel safe and alive for some reason. I’m not sure how I can describe what being alive through writing means though, so I’m not going to explain what it means.

But yeah, faith. What is your faith?

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4 thoughts on “Faith

  1. Hi Jasmine! I think this is by far my favourite post from you. I recently decided to become a free thinker myself. Growing up in a Christian family, I have been “clouded” (I guess that’s a way to put it) with thoughts that Christianity is the only way and I will go to hell if I don’t believe in Jesus. My ex was Malay and Muslim. (Obviously) And because of that I started opening my eyes and see things from another perspective. My mother however hates Muslims and Malays and upon finding out that I was dating a Malay boy, she took drastic measures and it was horrible. During this whole year, I was basically under house arrest and my mother kept telling me that I should carry crosses around and she made me get a tattoo of a cross. So yeah, I think if my mother left me alone and not bugged me about Christianity so often, I don’t think I would have made the decision to be a free thinker.

    1. Hi Daphne! Thank you so much for your comment! It’s pretty intense with what your mom did to you! I do agree with you though that if your mother didn’t bug you that often, you’d stick with what you’ve grown to believe in. I actually know someone who is deeply religious but was criticized badly just because he was friends with those other than his own race or religion. Now, he has turned out to be one of the most free thinking person I know, not that it’s a bad thing though. It actually became a positive thing because he is more open to accepting anyone and everyone, as oppose to the closed mindedness that other people had towards his fondness of people different from him.

  2. Hye jasmine!

    I admire your way of thinking and how outspoken you are. I really do feel how you feel. My dad is a muslim and my mum is a christian. I find it ridiculous how each religion condemns you to hell if you are a non believer. I’ve been mixing with both religions because of my parent’s background. Both are as kind and warm. And it disturbs me to know that no matter how much good you do with the sincerest heart, you’d be sent to hell just because you chose the wrong religion.

    Kudos to you for being awesome to talk about this in the open :D
    i dont think i would ever have the guts to even write it in my blog.

    1. Hey there!

      Thank you so much for writing a comment!! It means a lot that you actually came, read my post AND comment! You’re awesome :)

      I wrote this post (or any of my posts) because I strongly believe in the topic. I try to make it positive by talking about both sides of the coin instead of picking sides. I guess with that thought in mind, about being neutral, it kind of gave me the courage to write about sensitive issues. Whether the readers want to accept it or not, it’s up to them. Having said that though, it did take me quite some time to think about how I should go about the topic or whether I should write about it at all.

      I’m glad you agree with my thoughts though. It’s great to know that I’m not the only who feel this way.

      Leave your blog link next time! I would love to visit! :)

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