Nothing screams “ADULT” more than buying condoms. Especially, when you have to go into the store, get the condoms and pay the cashier all while pulling on a straight face.

You.

Same goes to other ‘sex-related’ stuff like pregnancy pills, morning-after pills (I think they’re the same pills :S), pregnancy test stick thingy and fun stuff like dildos or lubricants or one of them vibrating condoms or that edible underwear that tastes like shit (or so my sources – Youtube and articles – told me).

See the thing is, sex is taboo here in Malaysia. (Well, not just Malaysia obviously, everywhere else too, but let’s focus in Malaysia shall we?) Which is fine you know, because we are pretty open about a lot other things like alcohol and stuff, but I wished we were not so crazy and every bit uncomfortable about sex or worse still, uncomfortable about protecting ourselves against sexually transmitted diseases and babies even though how cute they are (the babies not the diseases).

“Let’s make sweet sweet love, baby.”

So it sickens me and my many friends (and you too, I reckon) at the thought of how hard it is to go out and get condoms without being slapped in the face with judgemental looks. I mean, come on!

Can you please just fucking ignore the fact that I’m having sex and more on the fact that I am protecting myself and probably you or your children and whoever from the diseases that may be the result from unprotected sex? Not that I will ever ever have sex with you or your children, but you know what I mean!

Condoms, condoms everywhere.

And worse still when things like these happen.

My friend, Ken, went to the pharmacy to get some morning-after pills for his friend Barbie.

Ken: “Hi. Can I get some morning-after pills.”

Pharmacist (girl): *finds pills* “Here it is. That would be RM50.”

Ken: “Okay.” *takes out money* “By the way, when do you usually take these? Is there a specific time?”

Pharmacist: *looks insulted* “How should I know. I’ve never used them before!”

Ken: *Shocked, takes his change and before leaving, says…* “This is not for me, you know. It’s for my friend. I just wanted to ask you since you’re a pharmacist.” *leaves pharmacy*

Wow. Just wow. And from a PHARMACIST!

No wonder Malaysia is filled stories about poor unwanted babies being thrown away. If only we were educated on the importance of safe sex and not judge people who have sex, problems like these could and would be reduced. Okay, telling people not to judge is a bit going overboard because they will judge, but look at it this way… Instead of judging how much of a slut I am, can you instead channel your energy to the positive I am doing to the society? Geez!

And notice that I highlighted on how important it is for Malaysians to be educated on the importance of safe sex and NOT on why you shouldn’t have sex at all, because in all seriousness, I’m not sure you can just go up a teenager and tell them, “Hey, don’t have sex,” when that is the time their hormones get all crazy and shit. Well, not just for teenagers, but for just about anybody really.

Sure, masturbating can perhaps, PERHAPS, make up for the absence of sex, but that alone wouldn’t be enough to make one wonder how sex feels like especially since we live in a sexualized world. (Though I’m sure someone out there are screaming, “HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT MASTURBATION AND SEX ARE THE SAME THING??!!!“)

When I grow up and have kids, I am going to bring them to the reproduction section of the store (Lol. Sounds weird!) and educate them on the importance of condoms, pregnancy pills and all round safe sex devices. I will teach them not to be afraid of sex or laugh at it or people who does it but be respectful (unless they’re a bunch of sluts and whores – interchangeable for both women AND men – who go around hurting people’s feelings and vajayjays/penises for fun which I will tell them to frown upon).

If society, especially those working in stores that sells condoms, pregnancy pills etc., keep on judging people who buy those, don’t be surprised if I open up my own store which I will proudly call, “Jasmine Ain’t Gonna Judge You!” store or the JAGJU for short. :P (I’ll come up with a better name next time, promise!)

But anyway, here’s some porn for your masturbating viewing pleasure.

And this.

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8 thoughts on “Buying condoms in Malaysia

  1. Super duper like this post. Its the same here. But it makes more sense here since its a 100% muslim country. But there there are people of different religions and races so people definitely need to be more open minded. I never faced such awkwardness there though. Lucky, I guess.

    1. Haha! I know right! Oh well. Like I said, people just need to adjust their mindset to not thinking that other people will think they are major sluts when it comes to buying condoms, but instead, think that they’re doing good for society. And then, probably, they’ll be less tensed and awkward when going out to get condoms :P

  2. Hi.. I just want to ask.. I am planning to visit my boyfriend in Malaysia and I asked him what he wants me to bring for him.. He said just a cartoon of condoms will do… I didnt get some of whay he said but he mentioned that when you are caught with condoms you can be imprisoned in Malaysia.. Now im having 2nd thoughts of bringing some for him bit I dont want to get pregnant.. Is there any truth to what he said abt being imprisoned if your caught in possession of condoms?

    1. Hi there! I doubt there are any laws that imprisons those who buy condoms because if there are such laws, then condoms wouldn’t be sold widely in stores in Malaysia. Also, why would someone go to jail to protect themselves against getting pregnant or any STDs? That’s ridiculous!

      Normally, religious authorities are against unmarried sex. So if your boyfriend is Muslim and you are caught having unmarried sex by the religious authorities, then your boyfriend may get jail time or pay a fine (please research on this). There have been some news about religious authorities busting Muslim couples (or partner).

      1. My boyfriend’s Christian so I don’t think that’s an idea.. He was just probably misinformed… So its fine ifi bring it there instead of buying there? No issues with airport authorities? Thanks for all the help!

        1. Yeah it’s fine. I have friends who brought condoms while they travel in and out of Malaysia and there wasn’t any problem, so there is nothing to worry about :) You’re welcome!

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