I love to compliment myself and I do think that I compliment myself way too much sometimes, not that it’s wrong or anything!
In Bahasa Malaysia, we have this saying.
“Masuk bakul, angkat sendiri.”
Which translates to, “You get into the basket and you carry it (or rather yourself) by yourself”. Which, if you think about it really really hard means ‘complimenting oneself shamelessly’, which mind you, is a really good thing. Well, I think it is a good thing anyway.
Here are some of the reasons why it’s really important to compliment yourself.
1. Nobody is going to do it for you.
Friends and family are great people to receive compliments from, but let’s be honest, not everyone is good at giving compliments these days. Families are more likely to give you ‘innocent’ insults rather than compliments during family dinners and it would just leave you feeling down. I said ‘innocent’ insults because they do not know that they’re insulting you because it doesn’t come into their brains that you have feelings too. Heh. Family!
The last time I went to a family event, my aunt was being all, “Wow Jasmine! Look at you! Why do you look so fat? Lose some weight girl!“
Why thank you Aunty and a very Merry Christmas to you too.
2. It’s a great pick-me-up!
There are times when you just feel ugly and there are only a handful of people who you can go to for a pick-me-up compliments and hugs, so you need to depend on yourself for some pick-me-up motivations once in a while.
Instead of telling yourself how ugly your hair is, try telling yourself that you hair doesn’t look that good today, but it will look good tomorrow. It’s definitely good to be positive, especially from yourself to yourself.
3. It’s a great confidence booster.
As a young girl, I’ve always been shy and self conscious. When you grow up as a fat kid, you’re always self conscious about yourself and feeling a bit low. It doesn’t help one bit when everyone is turning into a swan and you’re just an ugly duckling! (‘Everyone’ a.k.a. my little sister!)
But as a teenager however, I learn that the jokes I make about how pretty or awesome I feel/look/am to my friends were actually helping me to boost my self esteem! Although it was borderline obnoxious, I made it a point to not diss other people and just made it all about me because a) dissing people would make me an asshole and b) having everything all about me may lead people to find me annoying but at least I’m not an asshole to them.
Bottom line is, it really helped me to build up my self confidence.
Over the years, any bad dates or experiences would lead me into thinking, “Nah, they’re just assholes. They don’t know what they’re missing! I’m beautiful and intelligent! My momma says so and my friends say so! Screw them!” Or aunties, “She’s just self conscious about herself and who better to let all her frustrations out to but me?“
4. You learn to love yourself even more.
A compliment changes a person. It changes a person’s day from bad to good, it changes a person’s mood from unhappy to happy. Who knew a simple “You are very pretty” can completely transform a person, even if it is just for a while. So imagine getting ‘changed’ every day for the rest of your life all thanks to you!
I believe that the more you compliment yourself and the more love you give to yourself, you will in the end, love yourself even more and then, blame yourself a lot less for all the mistakes you made in the past. Also, you tend to take insults and critiques pretty lightly and make a witty comebacks to those stupid “You look fat!” comments.
My reply would usually be, “Don’t judge me. I’m fucking sexy under all these clothes alright!” Hmph!
5. You let go of negative people in your life.
One thing about loving yourself is that you love yourself enough to let go of those who hurt you and instead, surround yourself with people who love you. You’re like, “I can’t handle your shit no more, I’mma walk out of this and be with people I love and is okay with me saying fuck twenty-seven hours a day.” #swag
When the people around you makes you feel ugly and unappreciated, know that the problem is not you, it’s them.
I may not know all of you personally, but I do know that you are all special and awesome because you just are.
I love you. XOXO
Except for stalkers. Stalkers scare me. And racist, sexist bastards. You fucking suck.